lost

Had a very horrible nightmare which startled me awake, and I couldn't fall back into sleep. So here I am, blogging again.

Let's just say I wanted to travel to this special destination. I was waiting for a suitable cab that would take me to that special place. A cab stopped and I got in. Then I saw another passenger in the cab, on his way to another destination. I got off from the cab, because I know the cab won't bring me to the place that I wanted to go. The cab already has another destination, and it wouldn't be fair to pick up another passenger along the way.

So there I was again, back waiting at the taxi stand, hoping another cab would turn up, a cab which will take me to where I wanted to go. I've waited for so long I can't remember, and when I had just made up my mind to give up, a cab turned up. This time, I made sure there wasn't any other passengers before I step into the cab. Initially, I thought this was it, my ticket to the special destination I had wanted to go to, and my heart was filled with so much happiness I can feel colourful butterflies flying inside of me.

But some things aren't meant to be when it was never meant to be. After a short distance, the cab stopped and picked up another passenger. I was devastated. It only took me a short while to decide to leave and wait for another cab. But I soon realize, that I've left my wallet in the cab. And I was stuck in the middle of nowhere. Without my wallet, how am I supposed to board another cab, anymore?

I did not ask for a lot. I only hope that the cab would turn back and return me my wallet. Or the least, give me a call to tell me you've left with my wallet and you can't return it, so that I would stop thinking about it, and work to earn enough money to buy a new one. Just don't leave me waiting here in the middle of nowhere, waiting for the same cab to come back, waiting for an explanation.

Suppose I will never come across the same cab again, then would that mean I will never board another cab anymore?

I don't know, and for now, I don't even think I care anymore.

Well, that wasn't the nightmare which kept me awake until dawn but rather, something related to it. It was just so terrible I felt like my heart was ripped out from my chest and was torn into little pieces. I never thought I will describe it in such a way, but yeah, that perfectly describes the feeling I am feeling now.

Funny how the exam blues can get me into such moody modes. Dang.