Monday, August 23, 2004

coursemates, bad drivers, useless sportstars, the list goes on...

first of all, thanks a lot to my coursemates who tried so hard to make my life miserable. if you guys don't have the heart to finish up the practical and experiments, then why bother to come to the lab at all? don't be such an ass and attend this practical just for the sake of filling up your pathetic attendance quota, and screw up the experiments cuz you guys have some seniors' lab reports. if you guys can't think on your own and write your own reports, then just sit in your stupid room and memorise all those notes your good ol' seniors gave you. you guys are the reason why our third-world country keeps on producing first-world dumbasses. i don't give a damn whether you're scoring first class or dean's list, the singaporean kiasu looks on your faces make me sick. and while you're content to stay with your so-called 'achievements', don't try to show it off in front of me. i know you guys are good at it, but that's about all you're good at. get a life, there's more out there than just plain textbooks and libraries. so what if i don't look like one of you? i'm not trying to be one freaky nerd who doesn't even know how to throw a ball. if you guys know what a 'ball' is. so here i wish that we'll never meet again in our lives after we graduate, and good riddance.

and while i'm still in the 'pissed-off' state, today as we celebrate 'highway day', i wish that:
1) stupid drivers would switch on their headlights when it's raining heavily. i don't care if your car has outstanding colours or makes loud sounds, i CAN'T see your bloody car in the rain!
2) drivers would figure out first where they wanna go before they get into their cars. don't stop your car at the junction and decide then whether you should turn left or right. or a u-turn.
3) all those uncles, aunties, grannies, granpas and kiasees would stop crawling at the fast lane at 40km/hour.
4) all brainless maniacs who modified their cars with huge exhaust-pipe-that-looks-like-a-bucket-stuck-underneath-the-car would receive a RM5000 summon and get their license suspended.
5) while we're still talking about summons, i hope all those fat bribe-taking policemen would get fired and if they don't, i hope they burn in hell.
6) dumb motorcylists would stick to motorcycle lanes. i would be the first to wind down the window and shout 'hallelujah!!' if you guys get ran over by trucks.
7) drivers would put on theirs signals when they want to turn, and don't if they're not.
8) smart drivers would stop parking their cars in the middle of the road for 'just a short while' and expect us to squeeze to the other lane. use your brains a little and park where you're supposed to.
9) dumb taxi drivers would be a little more considerate and don't stop anywhere just to pick up some passengers. you passengers should be smart enough to know where to stop a taxi.
10) drivers would not slow down and roll at 5km/hour because it looks like there's an accident across the road. drive carefully and don't be such a busybody.
11) drivers would stop making a swift cut into the next lane when approaching a divider. make up your mind and stop daydreaming.
12) emergency lane stays as emergency lane. not 'i-woke-up-late-and-i'm-in-a-rush' kind of emergency.
13) dumbass drivers would stop driving the opposite direction on a one-way street.
14) brainless drivers would stop thinking that they're fast enough to get past the traffic light when it's yellow. you're no michael schumacher and you'll never be. i hope your car will get ran over by some trailer.
15) for god's sake, stop talking on the handphone when you're driving!

well, there's no such thing as 'highway day', but i guess it's about time to have one, eh?

now in our daily sports news, our pathetic malaysian so-called 'athletes' screwed it up big time again. "we'll win this, we'll win that." yeah right, why don't you guys go look at the mirror before you talk? badminton world champs? 'chumps' should be more appropriate. and josiah's (cycling) made to eat his word, he can't even qualify for the q/finals. unlucky to make 2 mistakes, he says. excuses, excuses, excuses. well, at least that's one thing we can beat other nations at, bragging. if olympics' gonna introduce this, we're first no doubt, with usa a close second. stop making empty promises and start doing what you're paid to do. while we're still on sports, wayne rooney admitted he did 'visited brothels and prostitutes'. "i was young then, i made mistakes." dude, you're only 18! how young is your 'young'? 13? what a sex-maniac, hope you'll get infected with syphillis.

entertainment, well, what can i say? it's like a disease that spreads so fast you won't have time to even pee. dumbass bands are introduced everyday. wherever you look there's a new idol in town. it's a trend right now, isn't it? walk out to the street, close your eyes and point your finger at any direction. whoever your finger points at has the potential to be a big star. come on, we're better than this. i'm terribly fed up with these boybands with members that looks like some porn vcd sellers at petaling street dancing on stage and polluting my tv. they not only look like those useless rascals, but act like one too. drugs, disco, you name it, we've got it. it's a sad world with these losers coming out as our idols, sigh. and if you're gonna sing, get your grammars right! i feel like smashing the radio everytime i hear this crap band sing "come on baby baby, you look so pity pity, do yo happy happy..." look, here's what you should do, take the money you gained from the sales you've got, and go attend primary school again before you make a fool out of yourself. oh wait, you already are a fool! silly me...

now that's a bit too much ranting to consume in one day, so i include here a joke just to lighten up the situation. while taking a jibe at the government, cuz i'm still in the mood:

three kids are playing at the playground, bragging about their fathers.
boy1: my father is an archer. he's so fast that when he shoots his arrow, he can reach the target before the arrow does.
boy2: that's nothing. my father's an fbi detective. when he shoots, he can reach the target before the bullet does.
boy3: i hate to disappoint you guys, but my father can beat your fathers anytime. he's a government servant, he's so fast his work ends at 4:30, he's already at home reading the newspaper at 3:45!

finally, have a good day, enjoy the sun and tomorrow will be a new chapter in your life! no, not you, bush, i hope you will be assasinated and rot in hell. for the others, bye for now...


tomatoinc said...

too bad we have to live with all those kiasu smart alecks. if they are really good at what they re doing nvm..this ppl..arggghj..luckily foreigners are not so kiasu.

btw...when u mentioned the 40kmph, it strucks me, are u driving above 80kmph already? hehehe

Lavender said...

whoa tomato, u're being sarcastic..arent u?? hehe.. anyway..looks like our fren here really pissed off with his coursemates.. hehe.. calm down la.. heheh ;) although it's true wat u said.. but try to chill out a little la.. nanti jatuh sakit oh.. hehe ;)

NiC said...

hahaha... i would have to agree with tomato...
and jason, who cares what the rest of the world is like? live your life and be cool dude... if you are not already... hahahaha...
btw, malaysian sports aint all that bad... josiah ng actually finished 5th in the keirin which is pretty amazing... you can't comdemn the whole nation over the fault of a few useless buggers... chill...