Monday, September 20, 2004

surrounded by shitheads

I just had my first practical test today, and it sucked. Thanks to these inconsiderate and selfish shitheads.

This test consists of 3 parts; a section where you have a hands-on experiment, a section answering questions and do some calculations, and the last part you’re given some explants and make a short essay of what you have observed.

Now, the shitty part is this; for the last section, you’re only given 5 minutes to go up front to the microscope and make a thorough observation before you return to your seat and write whatever it is that you think it is. But obviously, some people just don’t know how long 5 minutes is. Heck, some bitches even took 30 minutes to make that bloody observation.

Imagine a shithead doing this while you’re waiting for your turn:
00:00: starts walking to the front and sit in front of the microscope.
00:10: adjusts her seat and arranges her answer sheets nicely on the table.
00:25: takes a look at the Petri dish with full concentration.
00:50: a bird flew past and she looks out the window.
01:00: continues looking at Petri dishes.
01:15: holds the Petri dish up in the air, assuming the lecturer had pasted the answer underneath.
01:40: puts it down and takes another dish, again holding it up in the air.
01:55: puts it down and takes another dish, again holding it up in the air.
02:20: jots down some notes on the answer sheet.
02:50: stares blankly at absolutely nothing, wondering why her boyfriend didn’t call the night before.
03:20: looks at the answer sheet and realizes that she made some notes, and has to get a new one.
03:30: stands up and starts walking back to her seat in slow motion.
03:40: waves at another shithead looking at her direction.
03:45: takes a new answer sheet and walks back to the microscope in slow motion.
03:55: again waves at the same shithead and smiles.
04:05: takes her seat in front of the microscope.
04:15: adjusts her seat and arranges her answer sheets nicely on the table.
04:30: looks at the dishes and makes confused looks.
05:10: I put up my hand and complained to the tutor that 5 minutes has passed.
05:20: the tutor tells her to finish up fast.
05:25: she replies loudly, “I just started.”
05:50: stares blankly at nothing, wondering why her monthly pms cycle hasn’t arrived.
06:45: holds the Petri dish up in the air.
07:00: starts writing something down on her answer sheet.
08:15: stops writing and starts humming Jay Chou’s ‘Qi Li Xiang’.
09:10: continues writing.
10:05: I put up my hand and complained to the tutor that 10 minutes has passed.
10:15: the tutor told her to speed up.
10:30: puts the dishes under the microscope and starts to make observations.
11:10: holds the dish up in the air and hopes the answers were scribbled underneath.
11:30: puts it down and stares blankly at nothing, wondering if she has left her bag unzipped outside the lab.
12:05: continues writing.
12:50: stops writing and stares blankly at nothing, wondering how long it takes for her to gobble up a big mac.
13:20: continues writing.
14:25: adjusts her seat and arranges her answer sheets nicely on the table.
14:45: stands up and adjusts her hair.
15:00: walks back to her seat, waving to the same shithead again on the way back.

Bloody bitch. It makes me wonder how some people can get their brains so far up away from their ass.

When it was my turn, there was only 5 minutes left on the clock. I made my observation in 2 minutes, and wrote my bloody essay in the next 3 minutes. I have no idea what shit I wrote, even though I know exactly what’s the answer!

I hate my coursemates. I hope they get infected with syphilis and rot in hell.

It’s another day where shitheads emerged triumphant.

2 comments:

WY said...

Hahaha. I thought shitheads don't exist in prestigious university like UM. Guess i am wrong. :)

Anonymous said...

UM is full with shitheads...students and professors, alike...i can't wait to graduate in 1 1/2 years.